Did Your Parents Throw Dishes?

I know that you and your fiance NEVER have any kind of conflict! But how did your parents resolve their conflicts with each other? Better yet, how did they resolve conflict with you? The odds are that, unless you make a conscious decision to do something differently, you will use many of the same techniques to resolve future conflicts in your new marriage. That may or may not be a good thing. This makes the subject of conflict resolution style another good topic to consider and discuss with your soon-to-be-spouse.

Again, the more of these things that you can explore together as a couple on this side of your wedding day, the more prepared you will be to face things that are inevitable in marriage--such as conflict. Conflict is not avoidable in any close relationship. And, believe it or not, it's not all that important what kind of conflict style you have in a marriage--quiet, loud or somewhere in-between. The key is to have realistic expectations of what's coming. Then unpleasant surprises can be considerably minimized. And when disagreements inevitably do come, you will both have some insight about the other person that will allow you to sail through most potential arguments with minimal damage.

Whether you throw dishes or not, make sure that you both know each other's conflict resolution styles well. Then you can figure out what your joined style of resolving issues will be as a married couple together.